This ad will be forward and blunt, beating around bushes wastes time. It's getting cold out, I live in a tent, I don't have time to waste.
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I have section 8, I am disabled (but don't you dare count me out of anything because of it, just ask for more info, if you can actually help me with housing), I have a well trained well behaved service dog that is counted as durable medical equipment by the ADA and is therefore not even considered a pet. Also, as my service dog she is always with me and never alone in my apartment.
I also have a stunning personality and I don't smoke, drink, have parties or play loud music. I am quiet and laid back and just need an apartment to rent so I don't lose my fingers, toes, nose and ears to frostbite. Also, running warm water sounds amazing right now.
This is a serious posting. Please do not respond with unsolicited pictures of any kind, please do not offer me housing in exchange for ahem other services. I have the means to pay rent with section 8, I am just struggling to find something that fits in the little section 8 box.
The section 8 box:
$840 with all utilities included
Must have bedroom, living room, kitchen and bathroom (shower stall or tub okay)
Must be up to code and pass inspection
1st floor because of the physical limitations of my legs. I can walk, I could run to save my life and I could kick butt if my life depended on it. I just can't go up and down stairs on the daily.
Decent enough neighborhood, no drugs, I don't want my dog getting a habit I can't afford.
Must be able to handle my crude sense of humor.
Withing 30 minutes of Greenfield, or any of the hilltowns.
Thank you for reading.